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A Penny Dreadful

Mission Totally Mundane: A Library Security Breach October 15, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — donsie @ 22:19 pm
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Turnstile be damned!

Turnstile be damned!

 

Tonight I decided that the best way to spend my time treading water, as it were, while I wait for her child’s illness to subside and thus stop barring my departmental head of post-graduate admissions from beginning to register me was to get out some library books and pretend to begin conducting research.  I was being dragged there anyway to watch a mad Englishman hunt for texts relating to the profession of librarianship and so I decided I might as well come home with a few at least peripherally topical texts.  The problem was that when we arrived, while his External Borrower card allowed non-staffed hours access, I possess only my expired ID from my MA because of the gap between the conclusion of that degree and the delayed start of this PhD.  I was stuck at the turnstile without a friendly but incomprehensibly broad-speaking Yorkshireman porter to aid my entry and so, despite a web of CCTV coverage that would surely put MI6 to shame, I got on my knees and slid under the metal bars.  I am pleased to relate, Dear Reader, that my trench coat suffered no ill effects but I now live in fear that I will be hunted like the criminal I am by those very same porters, if they ever get the England score they so desperately sought.  As to what sport this referred I cannot say.  I was lucky enough, however, to experience the special and, I can only assume, prophetic thrill of having the lights in the stacks turned off on me while I searched among them.  I continued to poke around in the dark until an above-mentioned porter discovered me, shook his head, and pointed me toward the light switch.  I left it dark.  Expect more of the same in the coming months.